ROAD RANTS

Road Rants: Where is Peter Parker?

2013-06-01T00:00:00Z Road Rants: Where is Peter Parker?By Ben Brickman AUTO OUTRAGE CONTRIBUTOR nwitimes.com
June 01, 2013 12:00 am  • 

You never know what you are going to see when you twist the key and begin a trip on our roads. On my way home the other day I was traveling east on 73rd St. in Merrillville, approaching the intersection at Taft. The cemetery is on my left at the time. Suddenly, I see a person riding a bicycle down the middle of my lane and coming straight at me.

What makes this a little unusual is that this person is wearing a head -to-toe Spiderman costume. The person is about 5’7” tall and wearing a red mask. I can’t tell if it’s a guy or a gal but in the comics Spidey is a dude, so I will refer to him as such.

(This has got to be embarrassing for him, traveling around on a bike. Peter at least had a scooter.) Is he lost? He has no buildings to swing back and forth from. Shouldn’t he be flinging around Chicago? (They could use him!) And if he doesn’t get out of my lane, the cemetery on my left may come in handy. Where is Peter Parker? We need a picture of this! Why do I feel like chomping on a cigar?

Rant#1: Attention INDOT: An avid reader called in at 219-933-1010 and left a tip about the light at Highway 231 and Broadway in Crown Point. The person observed that if you are northbound on Broadway the light would remain green for only several seconds before changing. 1, 2, 3...to yellow. Motorists are forced to drive through red lights and its not only a nuisance, it's hazardous. This backs up traffic, makes it difficult to get out the subdivision and has been the scene of many accidents. How about giving motorists 15 to 30 seconds when the light is tripped?

Rant#2: A Dyer reader reported that on top of the normal traffic snarl at 45th and Calumet any Friday afternoon at 4 p.m., several Fridays ago it was 25-cent Slider Day at White Castle. Great planning, marketing people! Being from the Left Coast I will admit that I have yet to understand the fascination with White Castle. To each his own. I need an in-and-out burger.

What I find amazing is how this service station/ restaurant was conceived of at this location, with the amount of traffic that backs up on this corner. Was the traffic engineer smoking crack? You have cars and trucks sneaking through lanes of traffic and blocking oncoming traffic to get in or out of the station. On this particular Friday the burger joint placed a man with a sign on the corner yelling with the fervor of a street evangelist. Now all the cars driving down Calumet are diving across lanes of traffic for a crave case. What do sliders contain that cuase people to risk their cars and their lives?

Rant#3: One gentleman wrote in that he can’t stand people who change lanes without using their turn signals. After all, the rest of us sharing your road, would like to know where the h*** you are going! This reminded me of something that our roving reporter, Dan Rust suggests, “Eliminate turn signals from vehicles, no one uses them and the laws are not enforced.” Rust adds, “In exchange for the removal of turn signs from vehicles install medium-sized keyboards to make it easier for divers to text, they do it anyway. Throw in free WiFi too.”

Dan, sounds as if you have developed an attitude that is almost as bad as mine. Trust me, bad drivers don't need any more ideas about how to get us all killed.

It’s your turn. Want to vent about a bad intersection? Have a suggestion for useless car components? Have a Dimwit Driver Alert? Great! Send it to: RoadRants@nwi.com. You can also call in your rants at 219-933-1010. Leave your message. Include all the details. We will work it into the paper. We are also on Facebook, NWI Road Rants.

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