Rocker Ozzy Osbourne has a batty sense of humor.
The heavy-metal showman's pre-concert video drew howls of laughter Tuesday at Ozzfest at First Midwest Bank Amphitheatre. No greatest-hits reel for Ozzy; the Black Sabbath frontman bedeviled the nouveau famous by inserting himself into a montage of film clips that spoofed "Avatar" to "The Hangover." His take on "Twilight:"
Bella/Kristen Stewart: "Your skin is pale white and ice-cold."
Ozzy as Edward/Robert Pattinson: "... Vampires are (bleep). I'm the Prince of (bleeping) Darkness!"
Chicago Scene 'fesses that the pill-addled Brit voiced her sentiments exactly when he surfaced as Mike "The Situation" in MTV's "Jersey Shore." Resident sexpot Snooki huffy-puffed away when Osbourne advised her to cross her legs. Equally endearing was his cameo in Lady Gaga's "Telephone" video. Ozzy, in full drag as Beyonce, looked over the tarted-up Gaga and snorted, "What the (bleep) are you wearing?"
In spotlight
Oscar nominee Ed Norton ("Primal Fear," "Fight Club") is the opening-night attraction Oct. 7 at the 46th Chicago International Film Festival. Norton and director John Curran ("Painted Veil," "We Don't Live Here Anymore") will walk the red carpet at the Chicago premiere of their prison drama "Stone."
Bummer
Note to the Illinois State Fair: The Butter Cow Webcam is on the fritz. Fans are ready for a meltdown.
Please restore the link at http://www.agr.state.il.us/isf/attractions/buttercow.php.
Speaking of dairy wonders ...
Ben & Jerry's want to spread the love. The first 10 readers who reach this writer between 9 a.m. and 9:10 a..m. today will each receive a coupon good for a free pint of Ben & Jerry's ice cream, frozen yogurt or sorbet. The Cherry Garcia rocks. Call (219) 852-4329 in the designated time frame. No messages, please; voicemails don't count.
Grapevine
"America's Next Top Model" winner Jaslene Gonzalez hosts Miami Heat star Dwyane Wade and teammates at a late-night benefit Saturday at Crimson Lounge. Robbins, Ill. native Wade and pals will repair to Tantrik for another charity event Saturday ... Don't forget, the free Chicago Jazz Festival is just around the corner, Sept. 2 through Sept. 5 ... Cubs pitcher Randy Wells, hosting a fundraiser for the Lake Shore Animal Shelter at the Captain Morgan Club, didn't go home alone. He looked into a pair of big brown eyes, fell in love, and that was that. His new sidekick: A chocolate lab named Harry Caray after the Cubs broadcaster.
Opinions expressed are solely those of the writer. Reach her at molly.woulfe@nwi.com or at (219) 852-4329.
