For as long as I can remember, I have been on the pursuit of happiness. I have searched endlessly for the things in life that will give me long-lasting happiness.
In the process of my pursuit, I lost a sense of myself along with my surroundings. I forgot the key parts of being a teenager: living your life to the fullest and learning from your mistakes.
Instead, I focused on my minuscule problems that seemed much larger than they actually were. I allowed social problems to drown out all my happiness only bringing negativity into my life. I soon started blaming other people for my unhappiness when I should have blamed myself.
Letting the unhappiness in was welcoming. It was much more simple to be angry and negative rather than positive.
After reading the "The Art of Happiness in a Troubled World" by the Dalai Lama and Howard Cutler, I came the conclusion I am causing my own unhappiness.
I let the little things in life get to me when I should have been embracing the negative situations to make something positive out of them. I let the anger take hold of me, pushing away the people closest to me.
I interpreted the social situations the wrong way isolating myself completely from the people who were always there for me. I was blind to the happiness I did come into contact with daily letting the negativity swallow me whole.
I soon quit the search for nirvana; I challenged myself to alter my whole thinking process for I was the key to my own happiness. All I wanted was to be happy. Possessions and relationships would not grant me never-ending happiness; only I can make myself happy.
From then on, I took a positive aspect of every situation I was in not allowing anything negative to enter. I became thankful for the relationships I had and accepted the relationships I did not have. I realized the life lessons I learned from the past and present situations I encountered.
Becoming a happy person did not come easy, and it is still a battle to not let the negativity take over. Letting negativity in was not worth the depression and the worrying.
As teenagers, we become wrapped up with the boyfriend drama, friend problems and the expectations of schooling. We forget what being happy is all about as we juggle the minuscule problems.
I do not want to look back at my teenage years to see the negativity I let accumulate over the years. I want to see the happiness I experienced and the many lessons I still have to learn.
Being negative was not worth it. Only we can determine our own happiness.