I know you'll say I am crazy, that it can't be done.
Like putting a man on the moon, curing polio or eating 14 Twinkies in one minute.
But how about just trying this? If you don't like it, I won't ever mention it again. Let's conduct a normal election in Illinois.
It's at the local level. In 2000, voters in Calumet City elected Jerry Genova mayor, despite his looming indictment.
He was back in City Hall for a third term in April 2000. He was indicted for mail fraud and racketeering, and was convicted in 2001.
He's out now.
But they have nothing on the federal reps. Mel Reynolds was indicted in August 1994 on criminal sexual assault -- with a 16-year-old campaign worker.
He quit, then spent 36 months in federal prison before President Bill Clinton (who didn't have sex with that woman either) commuted Reynolds' sentence in 2001.
Hey, how about former U.S. Rep. Gus Savage, Mel's predecessor, who said he was under siege by the "white racist press" when it was reported in 1989 he was hitting on a Peace Corps worker in Zaire?
He was censured, but not removed.
We've got Todd Stroger replacing his dad John as Cook County Board president in 2006 after John was re-elected despite being in a coma.
Fast forward to today.
U.S. Rep. Jesse Jackson Jr., under investigation by the U.S. Department of Justice.
Although he was in the Mayo Clinic being treated for bipolar disorder, a serious health problem, he was reportedly well enough to give his mistress a $40,000 Rolex watch.
Now, reports are that Jackson will resign from Congress (let's see, that was on Nov. 6) and might take some jail time.
In our realpolitik world of Cook County, we can expect his wife to ascend to the seat he is vacating, as there is no evidence Gov. Pat Quinn is trying to sell it like his predecessor, former Gov. Rod Blagojevich.
One of those would-be Senate seat buyers was reportedly Mr. Jackson, but no word on whether he wanted the position for himself, his wife or his mistress.
Except now it looks like wife Sandi Jackson, the 7th Ward alderman in Chicago, might be in a legal morass of her own, or so reports The Wall Street Journal.
Were the Jacksons using money from his House spending account to redecorate their home? Is the government really interested in Sandi, or do they just want her to put pressure on her husband?
Jesse has referred to the media as "jackals," which I guess is a step up from the "white racist press" of Savage.
The jackal, after all, brings carrion meat to the boss -- the meat of a dead or dying animal.
If we are the jackals, what does that make Rep. Jackson?
The opinions are solely those of the writer. He can be reached at firstname.lastname@example.org or (219) 933-4170.