The recent rant by Porter County Board of Commissioners President John Evans about what he called the Chicken Little County Council raises many questions, such as: Which council members was he referring to as Henny Penny, Goosey Loosey and Turkey Lurkey? And is he Cocky Lockey?
Evans called upon his obviously vast store of literary knowledge to chastise some council members for what he saw as fearmongering comments by councilmen who claimed Porter County will lose $1.6 million because of Lake County's recent approval of a county income tax and that the county budget for this year already is overspent by $14 million.
Their financial "sky is falling" rhetoric would be cause for concern if true, but Evans said the Chicken Little Group is just grabbing headlines with "misleading and downright untruthful financial information." Grabbing headlines is something a man of culture, such as Evans, would never do with wild claims and name calling.
According to Evans, Porter County is in fantastic financial shape and is, in fact, the envy of almost every other county in the state. And why wouldn't Porter County be the envy of the state when it has John Evans as president of its board of commissioners?
When you have a John Evans in charge of things, having a County Council is pretty much superfluous. Especially one with members named Henny Penny, Goosey Loosey and Turkey Lurkey. The identities of the three do leave room for speculation of another kind, especially Henny Penny.
To me, that implies it's a woman's because a hen is female, but the other famous Henny — Henny Youngman — was a male. If, as I've been told, the three Chicken Little Group members are Councilmen Jim Biggs, Jeremy Rivas and Jim Polarek, is Evans casting aspersions on the manliness of one of the three, along with the insulting reference to their grasps of fiscal reality?
The fiscal truth of the county's condition undoubtedly lies somewhere between the claims of the opposing factions, in that no-man's, or no-Foxy Woxy, no-Drakey Lakey or no-Mousey Lousey, zone where the two sides seem unwilling to dip a timid toe, much less walk.
In a profound-grasp-of-the-obvious moment, one person said the county government, the same one that is the envy of the rest of the state, is dysfunctional. It's like Congress was in charge of the county and nobody wants to get along any more.
Or, to put it in terms someone of Evans' literary acumen might use, it all smells of something left behind by Bully Woolly.