You're Engaged! Whom Do You Tell First?

2012-07-23T11:13:00Z 2012-07-23T15:42:05Z You're Engaged! Whom Do You Tell First?By Christina Page, Devoted Weddings & Events
July 23, 2012 11:13 am  • 

It’s the most important question almost every girl daydreams about her whole life. And as he starts to get down on one knee, you realize your moment is here. A million thoughts go through your head, but you are able to get that one word out . . .Yes!

You are both walking on a cloud, but as you start to come back down to earth, you realize you need to tell everyone! And shouting from the rooftop will not suffice. So whom do you tell first, and how do you figure out the proper order without hurting feelings unintentionally? Without starting the stress, here is the general order:

1. Children: If one or both of the engaged couple has children, they are the first ones to be told. The addition of a step-parent and maybe even step-siblings can be a huge change for them. Be sure to be patient and understanding when telling them, and give them some time to process everything. Ex-spouses and adult children should also be informed, to smooth things over before publicly announcing the engagement.

2. Parents: The parents are the next on the list of people to inform. Each person should inform their own parents or do it as a couple. It’s best to tell in person, but depending on distance and your relationship with them, the phone is the next best option. Estranged parents shouldn’t hear the news from someone else, so even they should be told the news if possible. Be considerate of your parents’ feelings, especially if they don’t know this is coming.

3. Relatives and close friends: There is usually a list of relatives—including siblings, grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins and friends—that you are close to that you should inform next. When talking to your relatives and friends, don’t make any promises about bridal party selection, or you may end up with hurt feelings or a bridal party bigger than you wanted.

4. Coworkers and colleagues: As a courtesy, it’s a good idea to inform any supervisor or manager of your change in status and then tell your coworkers the good news.

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