A family focus: Catholic Charities Adoption Services give potential parents gift of life, opportunity

Brett and Michelle Friedman of Crown Point are happy to share their family story and involvement with Catholic Charities Adoption Services.

The organization, which is one of the programs of Catholic Charities of the Diocese of Gary, is the reason they're parents to 5-year-old Ellie and 2-year-old Logan.

"We've been married for 10 years and in 2003, I was expecting, but lost the child at 28 weeks," said Michelle, 33, a neonatal nurse at St. Anthony Medical Center.

"We started investigating adoption with a couple agencies and then my cousin suggested Catholic Charities Adoption Services."

Last Sunday, the Friedman family and dozens of other adoptive parents from around the region shared the afternoon at Wicker Park in Highland at the Catholic Charities Adoption Services Annual Picnic.

While enjoying fellowship and fun, the gathering also allows families to meet and share their experiences with prospective parents interested in the program, which has been in existence since 1937.

"While the process took about 11 months for Ellie, beginning with a home-study evaluation, it was much quicker for Logan," said Brett, who works in sales and marketing in Tinley Park.

Lisa Kavanaugh, a trained cardiac nurse and the adoption coordinator for Catholic Charities, which is based in Hammond, has been with the nonprofit organization for 12 years and is who Brett and Michelle Friedman call "their angel."

"Our goal is to unite families," Kavanaugh said. "What I do is both rewarding and also bittersweet. Because not only am I working with the adoption parents, I'm also there for the birth mother during her pregnancy helping her with the process and facing difficult decisions. This is the most unselfish thing these mother will ever do."

Reliant on various funding sources and donations, the primary cost for adoptive parents is usually around $2,000 for a placement.

But overall, the Catholic Charities Adoptions Services offers a range of services and support to ensure the process results in a seamless transition for both the expectant mother and the prospective parents.

One of the most common misconceptions is that Catholic Charities Adoption Services only serves expectant mothers and prospective parents who are involved with the Catholic faith.

"We are open to all who are interested," said Kavanaugh, explaining the organization serves Porter, LaPorte, Newton, Lake and Starke counties.

The other vital aspect the organization fulfills during the complicated process is to handle all of the legal considerations.

Attorney Tara Tauber not only represents Catholic Charities Adoption Services, but is also an adoptive mother who was served by the agency.

Tara and her husband, Douglas, of Crown Point are the proud parents of a 1-year-old, which is just one of the reasons Tara is so passionate about her responsibilities.

"We have the compassion and experience to help individuals and families navigate through the emotional stress and legal requirements associated with adoption," Tauber said.

Both Tauber and Kavanaugh describe the decision for a mother to allow her baby to be adopted as not only courageous, but also something that becomes a "grieving process of a living death."

"The day the mother and baby are discharged from the hospital, that's when the child is taken into our custody for the immediate placement because we want that new bond to begin at day one," Kavanaugh said.

"There isn't any further contact for the mother and child, but we continue to help the mother with moving forward with her life."

Kavanaugh said she usually assists with eight to 10 adoptions a year and many of the mothers are on Medicaid.

"We hear about expectant mothers who might be interested in our adoptions in a number of ways, from hospitals contacting to many of the mothers themselves, who contact us," Kavanaugh said.

"We're here to assist anyone with making decisions of the heart for happy future families."