I still remember my shock and dismay when I realized that sofas had to be bought. Somehow I thought sofas just happened. They always simply showed up in homes, hotels, and offices without explanation or fanfare, like feral kittens or bills.
Maybe it’s because I was the youngest in my family. Maybe it’s because I’m five-foot-three and have a voice like snow white, but I lash out like a cornered rattlesnake when someone doesn’t take me seriously.
I know, I know, to many of you the idea of decorating an empty room feels as horrifying as one of those dreams where you're suddenly in public naked. But I'm going to fix that.
Quick: Which room in your house needs attention the most? Kitchen? Bathroom? Garage?
The author of "Garage Sale Millionaire" had come to Orlando to visit theme parks with his wife and 3-year-old son. I took it as a sign. Divine deliverance.
Like my mother, the Roman God Janus — for whom January is named — had eyes in the back of his head. In fact, he had an entire face on the back of his head, so he could look backward and forward at once. This feature earned him the distinction of “god of doors.” He ruled comings and goings.
This time of year I always feel a little sick to my stomach, and not just because of those midnight romps at the dessert buffet with the bottomless glass of Prosecco. (Do they make a combo antacid headache tablet?)
A look back at the lessons the year served up reveals I once again had my share of jams, upheavals and awakenings. I faithfully reported these with what I hope some would call humor served with a dollop of advice on the side.
Follow The Times
- 1 2 injured in crash on U.S. 6 in Jackson Township
- 2 This bites: Emerging breed of mosquito is more aggressive
- 3 Task force releases details in fatal shooting of M'ville officer
- 4 Tri-Creek, Crown Point, Merrillville schools close Monday to accommodate funeral traffic
- 5 Gaucho's Brazilian Steakhouse to return
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Friday, September 12, 2014
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